For hc_bingo.
Jul. 10th, 2017 07:23 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ladyofleithianTitle: Sunlight
Summary: Finn comes to terms with the concept of identity.
Prompt: Loss of identity
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
It's still strange adjusting to having a name instead of a designation.
Finn won't deny that that's the case. He's been used to, from babyhood, being given a designation. No name, not for him. Maybe you got nicknames for others, like Slip (and Finn still mourns him, but he can understand. It's not like he's innocent either. He's definitely got the blood of more than a few of his squadmates on his hands, people he used to fight alongside) but definitely not for him.
FN-2187.
Finn.
Poe was the one to find him, give him a name.
Finn is grateful for that.
Rey was the one to look at him as if he meant something.
Finn is grateful for that. Adores them both, actually. Wants them to be happy. He wonders what Rey's doing...wherever she is. He can only hope she's safe.
***
Finn adores Poe, and Poe doesn't know it. (Of course, he's probably one of a million admirers, and Poe's married, apparently. He deserves better than Kylo Ren, but Finn doesn't say it aloud. He doesn't dare)
Because Poe is the sunlight, and he doesn't seem to have any idea how wonderful he really is. Rey looked at him the way no one else ever had, and so did Poe. Addressed him like a friend, like a person. Gave him a name. Finn is still trying to come to terms with that.
They're still relaxing on Bespin. Well, for a loose interpretation of that. For starters, Poe is badly hungover after the events of last night, and Finn wishes he could go and comfort him.
Actually, why not go and comfort him?
Finn goes up to Poe's door in that moment and knocks. "You there, buddy?" he says.
"Yeah." Poe's voice is muffled. He even sounds awful, Finn can't help but think. He sounds so incredibly awful that Finn hurts for him.
"Do you want me to leave?"
"No. Come in." A groan. "It's not you, Finn; it's just my head. I feel like it's being ripped apart."
"Sorry to hear that."
"S'all right. But yeah, you can come in. Really."
Finn does. Poe...Poe just looks terrible. Awful, actually. His hair's stringy, and he's currently pinching the bridge of his nose.
"You doing okay?" Finn says.
Poe grins at him weakly. "Never better."
Finn sits next to him. It's unfair that someone as beautiful (and Finn knows that Poe is beautiful, because there's something about him that's more than just his good looks; it's like a radiant light that shines over everything Poe touches) and kind and funny and brave as Poe would have to go through something like this.
Kylo Ren is a monster. Finn knows that much. The worst part was that when Finn first met him, he seemed so graceful, so awe-inspiring. Now Finn knows otherwise. And after what he did to Poe, Finn hates him even more.
They talk. Finn updates him on what happened while he was out, and reassured him again that it's not his fault. He doesn't tell Poe the whole truth, that Poe is the sunlight to him. Perfect. Wonderful.
Poe will never understand. Poe will never understand how much he means to people. But Finn knows, he just knows, he'll never let him down.
Summary: Finn comes to terms with the concept of identity.
Prompt: Loss of identity
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
It's still strange adjusting to having a name instead of a designation.
Finn won't deny that that's the case. He's been used to, from babyhood, being given a designation. No name, not for him. Maybe you got nicknames for others, like Slip (and Finn still mourns him, but he can understand. It's not like he's innocent either. He's definitely got the blood of more than a few of his squadmates on his hands, people he used to fight alongside) but definitely not for him.
FN-2187.
Finn.
Poe was the one to find him, give him a name.
Finn is grateful for that.
Rey was the one to look at him as if he meant something.
Finn is grateful for that. Adores them both, actually. Wants them to be happy. He wonders what Rey's doing...wherever she is. He can only hope she's safe.
***
Finn adores Poe, and Poe doesn't know it. (Of course, he's probably one of a million admirers, and Poe's married, apparently. He deserves better than Kylo Ren, but Finn doesn't say it aloud. He doesn't dare)
Because Poe is the sunlight, and he doesn't seem to have any idea how wonderful he really is. Rey looked at him the way no one else ever had, and so did Poe. Addressed him like a friend, like a person. Gave him a name. Finn is still trying to come to terms with that.
They're still relaxing on Bespin. Well, for a loose interpretation of that. For starters, Poe is badly hungover after the events of last night, and Finn wishes he could go and comfort him.
Actually, why not go and comfort him?
Finn goes up to Poe's door in that moment and knocks. "You there, buddy?" he says.
"Yeah." Poe's voice is muffled. He even sounds awful, Finn can't help but think. He sounds so incredibly awful that Finn hurts for him.
"Do you want me to leave?"
"No. Come in." A groan. "It's not you, Finn; it's just my head. I feel like it's being ripped apart."
"Sorry to hear that."
"S'all right. But yeah, you can come in. Really."
Finn does. Poe...Poe just looks terrible. Awful, actually. His hair's stringy, and he's currently pinching the bridge of his nose.
"You doing okay?" Finn says.
Poe grins at him weakly. "Never better."
Finn sits next to him. It's unfair that someone as beautiful (and Finn knows that Poe is beautiful, because there's something about him that's more than just his good looks; it's like a radiant light that shines over everything Poe touches) and kind and funny and brave as Poe would have to go through something like this.
Kylo Ren is a monster. Finn knows that much. The worst part was that when Finn first met him, he seemed so graceful, so awe-inspiring. Now Finn knows otherwise. And after what he did to Poe, Finn hates him even more.
They talk. Finn updates him on what happened while he was out, and reassured him again that it's not his fault. He doesn't tell Poe the whole truth, that Poe is the sunlight to him. Perfect. Wonderful.
Poe will never understand. Poe will never understand how much he means to people. But Finn knows, he just knows, he'll never let him down.
