![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ladyofleithianDisclaimer: I own nothing.
There was something about the very idea of this Council meeting that was enough to make Obi-Wan feel almost uneasy. Which he supposed he shouldn’t be feeling. After all, they were on the same side, at least somewhat relatively enough. After all, they were friends, in a sense – and yet at the same time, he couldn’t help but feel almost uneasy. Even getting the information through to Padmè on the planet of Utapau, even getting the information that they were on the Mustafar system, and not Utapau...even seeing Padmè nod, Obi-Wan could not help but feel ever more fearful for his young...
Well, she wasn’t a Padawan anymore, not by any stretch of the imagination. And yet at the same time, Obi-Wan thought, she was still very much like a Padawan to him. In his mind’s eye, he could still see the bright eyed, inquisitive young girl that he had taken in long after Qui Gon’s death. In his mind’s eye, he could still see himself teaching her things about the Code, and her asking questions, and him telling her that, at least for now, she had to clear her mind of questions and meditate.
After all, a Jedi always had to be seeking knowledge. But sometimes, asking “why” a bit too much...sometimes it could do more harm than good. And Obi-Wan didn’t want to consider that fact. If anything, he doubted that he could ever consider that idea – that curiosity could –
He had to cut that thought off at the pass. It wasn’t just a matter of curiosity killing the metaphorical cat. It was a matter of galactic safety and security, security for the Republic, and finding out just how they were being played like pieces in a game of dejarik. It was a matter, really, of doing the right thing. And that, really, was what being a Jedi was all about, wasn’t it?
So it was long after Padmè had signed out that Master Windu turned to look at Obi-Wan. “Obi-Wan,” he said, and there was something about him calling Obi-Wan that and not “Master Kenobi”, or something similar, that surprised Obi-Wan. Moreso was the way he said it, really. Then again, perhaps it was just a slight overreaction on his part. “I think it’s time that you went to see the Chancellor.”
“That,” Obi-Wan said, “Goes without saying.” He stood up, turned back to look at the other Council members. Then Master Windu spoke again.
“Obi-Wan,” Master Windu said, “May the Force be with you.”
“And with you.”
As Obi-Wan strode out of the Council chamber, he could already feel one part of himself wondering what Master Windu was talking about. After all, what was the worst that could happen? It was simply an assignment of telling the Chancellor the news about Padmè going to engage Grievous and Dooku. It wasn’t as if anything could possibly go wrong.
And yet at the same time, it was a matter of gauging the Chancellor’s reactions. Which, something in Obi-Wan said, shouldn’t be happening. They were supposed to be on the same side, not being drawn in by Dooku’s lies about the Republic. After all, for all they knew, Dooku could have been playing both sides. Dooku could have been the true dejarik master, with “Darth Sidious” being, quite honestly, no more than a cover up.
And yet at the same time...
Somehow, Obi-Wan thought, the attack on Five Hundred Republica, as well as several other events, was far too precise to not have a Sith Lord somehow controlling it. Somehow –
And then there was the matter of Vader and Ventress. While the Council meeting had assured Obi-Wan that the two were at least recovering and being cared for in the finest prison cells that Coruscant had to offer (and the most high security as well), there was something in Obi-Wan that wondered if they were talking to the wrong person in the matter, in other words, Palpatine. Vader and Ventress...they would be reliable sources, wouldn’t they?
Obi-Wan sighed and ran a hand through his hair wearily. Focus on the mission, Obi-Wan Kenobi. That’s what matters. Nothing else. Do your duty for the Council and then report. That’s what matters in the end, doesn’t it? It’s the right choice and you know this.
And yet at the same time, he was nervous. He couldn’t help but feel it. Nervous, uneasy...
Even calling the nearest shuttle to take him to the Chancellor’s office, even taking the shuttle, there was something about sitting beside the red guards that made him feel almost uneasy. The new guards that Palpatine had put up to guard him – all right, maybe not new, Obi-Wan corrected himself. They had been around for quite a while. He had to suppress a sigh; sleep had become so rare nowadays that everything seemed, if anything, scrambled.
It felt as if events were blurring too close together, melting into a mess of time and seconds and days and months and years. A cauldron of confusion, one could say. At least focusing on Master Yoda’s teachings of patience and Qui Gon’s teachings about the Living Force, as well as mentally reviewing the mission over in his head again could at least somewhat keep him calm. Even running over the Code again (“There is no emotion, there is peace...there is no passion, there is serenity...there is no ignorance, there is knowledge...there is no death, there is the Force...”) could at least stop him from going completely insane. And finally, they reached the Chancellor’s office.
Even getting off the shuttle and onto the platform, Obi-Wan could already feel his unease spike. Even ahead of him, the door to the Chancellor’s office seemed almost impenetrable, guarded by more men and women in red cloaks. More Red Guards. Red Guards that were highly trained in combat and ready to tear you apart if necessary.
Still, there was really no use in being afraid. There is no emotion, there is peace...
At least memorizing the Code again could keep him from shaking.
Even speaking with the Red Guards, saying that he had a meeting with the Chancellor, something in Obi-Wan at least relaxed if only slightly. At least from here, hopefully, this would be slightly easier. Emphasis on the slightly.
But then again, it was just a meeting with the Chancellor. What was there possibly to be afraid of?
It was once he entered the Chancellor’s office that he heard traces of the Chancellor speaking with someone else. Some sort of meeting coming to an end. Jar Jar Binks was there, dressed in his best Senatorial regalia, as was Bail Organa, and Mon Mothma, and...Sabe?
He supposed that he shouldn’t be surprised. And yet at the same time, he was. If there was anyone more loyal to the Republic, it was Sabe. She was devoted to it. She would no doubt give her life for it if need be.
Padmè was the same way.
And Obi-Wan supposed that there was a trace of it in him as well. He couldn’t say that he liked where the Republic was going nowadays, but it didn’t mean that he didn’t think highly of it. Quite the opposite, really.
It was even hearing those last words from Sabe, “On behalf of the Petition of the Two Thousand...I thank you, Chancellor.” The way she said those words, she might as well have been pulling teeth saying them.
“As do I, Senator Amidala.” The Chancellor’s words seemed just as forced, as did his smile – and if anything, Obi-Wan mused, there was nothing at all funny about that. Not this time, at least. Usually, one would find a way to at least have some degree of a smile at accidentally using the word “force” as a pun – not exactly something recommended by the Jedi Code (while it didn’t disapprove of it, it didn’t exactly encourage it either. At least from what Obi-Wan could gather) but therapeutic nonetheless, especially in tough situations – but if anything, Obi-Wan’s mind was frazzled enough by the meeting (and not even the most routine recitations of the Jedi Code could assuage that feeling) to know that, in a sense, using the word “force” as a pun would be far from appropriate, as this situation was far from funny.
Even the reminder to himself that it was just a routine meeting with the Chancellor didn’t help. If anything, Obi-Wan thought, it almost made it worse. Padmè had some degree of practice with this. And so did he, he assumed, but this? This was far from what he ever expected.
The Chancellor continued speaking to Sabe about how it was a pleasure to meet with her group, in that same almost forced way, as if he was trying to be polite. Obi-Wan could sense, however, that the meeting had quite aggravated him. All those who gain power are afraid to lose it...
And Obi-Wan could not help but wonder if that was what happened to Chancellor Palpatine. The man who had championed democracy so highly, who wanted nothing more than the best for Naboo, had become infatuated with power and afraid to let it go. It was something that had always made him extremely distrustful of...most politicians, at least. The idea that some were more out for their own power than anything else. It was enough, at least, to make him question some of the motives of the politicians that came out of there.
People such as Bail Organa and Fang Zhar and Sabe Amidala were honorable enough. But the others? They were mostly men and women in a position of power, squabbling like rancors over a scrap of raw meat while the rest of the galaxy suffered. And while some would accuse the Jedi of doing the same (the reporter Matthew Travis came to mind, sadly enough), at the very least, Obi-Wan thought, they at least cared something about the galaxy. Travis had been on the Holonet quite a while ago, asking why the Jedi were more concerned about people trying to secede from the Republic than about helping those on Tatooine, for example. “There are those in the Outer Rim that have been sick and dying,” Travis had said, in that sort of impassioned, furious tone that never failed to seemingly win him a viewing of millions (and a devoted army of sorts), “And the Jedi and the Republic are more concerned about those who would dare to secede from a corrupt government because of personal differences. How in any sense is that evidence of their alleged ‘clear’ thinking?"
It was enough to make Obi-Wan angry thinking about it. Because even if Travis had some points worth considering, did he not realize that those on Naboo had been suffering as well when the Trade Federation had first invaded? Labor camps that the Federation had built for them, for starters. Blockades. They hadn’t really expected a simple trade dispute to turn into a full scale war, but then again, Obi-Wan supposed, they were barely prepared for anything these days.
And then there was the matter of the Clone Wars themselves. Who was Travis, a mere civilian, to make the Jedi Council’s decisions for them? To assume that he knew who was worthy of living and dying? Going along that line of thinking – if one was to go along that line of thinking, at least too far along that line of thinking, it would most certainly lead them on the road to becoming a monster. Not at first – it would begin, no doubt, with the best of intentions. But eventually, like Dooku, like the Lord Revan and his Revanchists, it would descend into darkness, choosing who lived and died on a mere whim. It was not the Jedi’s place to decide what was more important. They were no more than the humble servants of a greater cause.
Obi-Wan supposed that he could understand why Travis would feel this way. After all, the man was almost all fire. All passion and conviction – some of it was no doubt just to get further Holonet ratings, as most shows did, but other parts...Obi-Wan had a feeling that he did mean it. In a sense.
The Jedi were not the cold, calculated beings that most wanted to believe that they could be. If anything, they did what they could. They did what was right, even if it meant going against what other people in the Republic would think was right. Perhaps they had committed crimes in the past – the story of Lord Revan and the Jedi Exile, for example – but those were the crimes of the past, and not the present. They were better than this. All of them.
At least, Obi-Wan thought, he could only hope that that was the case.
Otherwise, he would lose hope quickly. And that...that was far from a good thing.
The Delegation of the Two Thousand left now, but not before Sabe sent a glance Obi-Wan’s way. It was a simple glance, but even looking at her, it was plain and simple to see that she was thinking, or almost saying to him, even, What are you doing here, Obi-Wan?
Obi-Wan supposed that it was best to explain to her somewhat. Perhaps after the meeting. Mouthing a quick, I will explain later, he then turned to look at the Chancellor. “Hello, Chancellor,” he said, “It’s good to see you again.”
“Hello.” Palpatine still seemed to be, if only slightly, irritated from the meeting that he had just experienced.
Obi-Wan turned to look back at Sabe, who was now exiting the room. He almost wanted her to be there, but at the same time...what if she learned of the true purposes of why he was here? To gauge the Chancellor’s reaction? To gauge whether or not the Chancellor was the Sith Lord that they were looking for?
Obi-Wan almost couldn’t believe that they were subscribing to a sort of philosophy where they had to believe Dooku’s statements about a Sith Lord running the Senate. For all they knew, Dooku could have been trying to throw them off. And yet at the same time...
Dooku had always been a well intentioned Jedi, even from when he was a boy. The incident with Lorian Nod aside, of course.
And yet at the same time...
Obi-Wan tried, at least, to keep himself composed. “The Jedi Council has acted on the information that Clone Intelligence has sent out, Chancellor. Padmè – I mean, Knight Naberrie, has gone to Mustafar to engage General Grievous and Count Dooku.”
Palpatine merely raised an eyebrow. “Indeed?”
“Yes.” Obi-Wan couldn’t help but feel if only slightly disappointed. In a sense, he had a feeling that this was, at least for now, nothing really to write to the Council about. If anything, it seemed to be the opposite of that. And then there was something in him that, despite everything, felt the first stirrings of anger. How could Palpatine be so seemingly apathetic and uncaring and utterly indifferent to the idea that Padmè, someone who looked up to him like a father, could possibly die out there?
Then again, Obi-Wan mused darkly, he supposed that he was foolish to expect anything better from Palpatine.
No. Stop. Don’t let your personal biases get in the way. Obi-Wan took a deep breath, trying, at least, to compose himself. He only hoped that Palpatine couldn’t read what he was really feeling.
Then again, it wasn’t as if the Chancellor could use the Force. Obi-Wan could remember one comment from Mace Windu, at least once, about Palpatine making a fine Jedi. Which he supposed was true. And yet at the same time...
“Chancellor,” he said, and he almost didn’t know why he was saying what he was saying, but he supposed that it was just about anything to keep the conversation going. To gauge the Chancellor’s reactions. “Do you think that Knight Naberrie is up to the challenge?”
“There’s really no need to call your comrade ‘Knight Naberrie’. After all,” Palpatine said, calmly, “You have known her for quite a while.”
Ah. “I suppose I have,” Obi-Wan said, and it was there that he realized just how anticlimactic that sounded, even in that moment.
“Of course. And why would you need to come to me in order to tell me – ’’
“I thought at least,” Obi-Wan said, “I mean...we thought that you would like to know. After all, the war is about to come to an end, isn’t it?”
“I would not go so far as to say that, Master Kenobi.”
“Indeed?” Obi-Wan supposed at least now, the conversation was getting slightly more interesting. “Why is that?”
“Well, let’s be honest with ourselves,” Palpatine said, “Do you really think the war will be over when Grievous and Dooku are defeated? When the Separatists are defeated? Do you really think that the war will end if only with that?”
That was something that Obi-Wan had not considered. And even now, he thought, he wasn’t certain whether or not he wanted to consider it. He swallowed.
“Perhaps not, Chancellor,” he said, “But at the very least, it may be a new beginning.”
Silence.
Palpatine, if anything, seemed thoughtful. Then he said, “Master Kenobi...if we may have a further word?”
“Yes?”
There was something about following Palpatine into the antechamber with the antique Nubian art that Obi-Wan had to wonder about. Why would Palpatine need to have a word in there? It wasn’t as if there were any potential eavesdroppers.
Except me. Obi-Wan supposed that he could, at least, count as some sort of eavesdropper. After all, he had volunteered for the mission.
He could only pray that Padmè didn’t really realize what he was really doing. That she didn’t realize that two of her mentors were essentially playing games with one another. Breaking her heart...Obi-Wan didn’t want to think of doing that. If anything, breaking her heart...
He had already seen her heart broken enough during the Clone Wars. Ahsoka’s death, and the death of Steela – to make the matter worse, they had been held back by the Council during all of this, and thus were unable to act. Even if the Council had some sort of reason for it, it was still enough to make Obi-Wan angry thinking about it. He could already feel the anger beginning to swell in him, to make its way through his hands, forming them, almost unconsciously, into fists. He tried to calm himself, tried to tell himself to focus on the mission and not on what the Council had done, and yet at the same time –
“Are you well, Master Kenobi?” Palpatine, cutting into his thoughts. Sounding almost concerned. Normal, really. At least, it sounded almost like some of the rare conversations of civility that they had. Padmè was the closest to him, almost like a daughter to him. Obi-Wan, if anything, was more like...more like...
He almost didn’t know what Palpatine would no doubt think of him. Probably as the overprotective older brother who kept holding her back. Which wasn’t his intention. He wanted the best for her. Wanted to help her. And yet at the same time, he knew that he couldn’t hold her back forever, at least back when she was a Padawan. Back when she was still a Padawan, and as cheerful and curious as the rest of them. Back when she looked at the galaxy through an almost childlike view, at least for Obi-Wan, and not as a hardened General, looking for the problems that needed fixing.
At least, as a General, some of that was still there. She still chatted with the troops eagerly as if she was one of their own, and sought to fix the matters of injustice and whatnot. And yet at the same time, there was something in her that was so much colder, so much sadder, and so much more distant. Obi-Wan doubted that he could put his finger on it. Some would have assumed, no doubt, that that was what the Jedi wanted her to be – sadder and slightly more detached (he said slightly if only because, in all honesty, nothing could really cause Padmè to be detached. Not once, not ever) and brutally pragmatic. Travis, Obi-Wan noted with a slight hint of distaste (well intentioned as the reporter might be, he was still very much wrong about a lot of things. Not that he would seem to care. At least, not from what Obi-Wan saw), would have said that that was what the Order wanted. Forging their students into brutally precise instruments of hatred – but he was wrong.
That was the way of the Sith.
The way of the Jedi was, at least, learning to let go of grief and hatred and fear. Those emotions no doubt couldn’t be helped, at least from what Obi-Wan had seen over the years. But learning to control them, to purge them – that was the mark of a great Jedi. That was the mark of a truly great Jedi.
And it was something that people like Travis didn’t understand. Perhaps it was not necessarily Travis’ fault, and yet at the same time –
What if he is right? A voice niggling in the back of his head, a voice that sounded, almost, like Padmè. What if the Order we have fought so hard to sustain no longer exists? And the Jedi are becoming no better than the enemies we fight?
He could still remember his talk with Padmè long after Onderon. That idealism and conviction that blazed in his Padawan’s eyes, never fully able to be contained, as she spoke. “Master...Obi-Wan...” She bit her lip; she was far too self contained to fidget, but something in her posture told Obi-Wan that she almost seemed to want to. She looked up at him now. “This war is being caused by a failure to listen. I know that much. The Separatists...all they ever truly wanted was to leave the Republic peacefully and we pushed them into a position where they had no choice.”
“I wish I could believe you, Padmè,” Obi-Wan said, “But I can’t.” He took a deep breath. “I doubt we would have gotten involved in the first place if not for the lengths that they were willing to go to if only to accomplish their goal. Freedom from the Republic is an understandable goal, but the lengths they were willing to go to...that was wrong.”
“I’m not denying that,” Padmè said, “It’s only that...” She sighed. “I wish there was a better way.”
“There’s always a better way,” Obi-Wan said. “I know that all too well.”
For all he had tried to reassure her and help her and teach her, at least in a sense, Obi-Wan could not help but feel a small part of him begin to disagree. The Jedi were keepers of the peace. And here they were, being pushed into a role that they were simply unable to really cope with.
We’re keepers of the peace, Mace Windu had told him once, Not soldiers. All in regards to liberating Onderon. Padmè had had that idea. Something in Obi-Wan wondered how she could go along with the idea of liberating Onderon and yet say that the war was caused by a failure to listen...and then he reminded himself that whatever the reasons were, going deeper would lead to answers that he never truly wanted.
Still, a Jedi always had to be seeking knowledge. That...that at least, he was certain of.
Which was no doubt another reason he was in the Chancellor’s office. If he didn’t do this, if he didn’t find the Sith Lord in the Chancellor’s midst or otherwise, who would he be? He would be letting Padmè down, in a sense. Disappointing her. And that was the last thing he wanted.
Still, he would go through with this. Being cruel to be kind, at least. Cruel to be kind...that, he supposed, he could do.
“Master Kenobi,” Palpatine said, “What is troubling you?”
“Nothing truly, Chancellor,” Obi-Wan said. “You wanted to speak with me.”
“Oh yes.” Palpatine smiled, if only pleasantly. “But if you wish – ’’
“Actually, Chancellor,” Obi-Wan said, and he was fully aware of how much he was no doubt going against the rules of what was happening, but he had to at least get it out of the way. The Council had not necessarily sent him here to ask about ancient Sith legends, and yet... “The matter of Darth Plagueis...did he have any further plans before he died?”
Silence.
“Go on, Chancellor,” Obi-Wan said, “I am not going to indict you for mere curiosity in regards to a Sith legend.” Unless I have to... And even now, he could only hope that that would not be the case.
“Well,” Palpatine said, “If I recall correctly, he had many plans before he died. One of them, from what I read, was to subvert the Rule of Two – ’’
“Forming a Sith army?” Obi-Wan’s brows furrowed. “But why? What would he need them for?” Something in him told him that he already knew the answer, though. Forming an army to take down the Republic...
“I cannot say. Most likely to safeguard his new Empire.”
“Empire?”
“Oh yes. He wished to avenge the Sith if only for the sake of the greater good.”
“How does one even do that?”
“The Sith...” Palpatine seemed thoughtful. “From what I have gathered, there really is no difference between the Jedi and the Sith. They are simply two different philosophies – one believes in power through understanding, and the other believes in understanding through power. That is truly the only difference.”
“I would not truly say so, Chancellor. With all due respect,” Obi-Wan said, “The Sith...they think inwards, only about themselves. That’s why they always lose.”
“And yet they keep finding new ways to survive over the years. It at least says something admirable, I believe, about their perseverance and determination.”
“I would – ’’ Obi-Wan couldn’t bring himself to, truly, finish that sentence. He couldn’t chalk it up to coincidence, because in the Force, there were no coincidences. He couldn’t chalk it up to luck either, because in the Force, there was no such thing as luck. “I would say that the Jedi do the exact same thing,” he said, and even that, in his mind, sounded anticlimactic. “It’s the way of things. The way of the Force.”
“And yet the Jedi have still found no way to adapt to the times. Taking children away from their parents – ’’
“It is for the best, Chancellor,” Obi-Wan said, and though something in him wondered why he was getting in a philosophical debate with the Chancellor, at the same time... “Attachments cannot be formed.”
“Indeed. But what of other cultures? What of other means? Wouldn’t you say that taking a child from those environments disrupts the entire basis of the culture? Disrupts a family? Disrupts a way of life? And what of these gatherings? Placing the younglings in danger all for lightsaber crystals.”
Obi-Wan suddenly went cold. Even that memory of Ahsoka and the younglings being abducted by Hondo and his men – though it had worked out for the best in the end, even that –
Don’t think of Ahsoka. Don’t think of her. Just don’t.
“You still grieve for Padawan Tano, don’t you?”
“Chancellor, please,” Obi-Wan said, and he could already hear his voice beginning to crack. “Stop this.”
“But you do. And all these Jedi teachings,” the Chancellor said, if only softly, “Can’t really block out the grief that’s coming. I think I know, at least, why they believe in blocking off emotions. They’re afraid of them. Because they hurt, don’t they? Because you fear what may happen when you’re overwhelmed by emotion?”
“Chancellor, just stop.” Obi-Wan could already feel the pain beginning to well back into his eyes.
“They are afraid,” the Chancellor continued. “Afraid of what they are capable of. They merely suppress their fear if only because the truth is too horrible. They are consumed by it. You have seen it, haven’t you? Fear of you, fear of Padmè, fear of what you could accomplish.”
“They are not afraid,” Obi-Wan said. “They...”
“And yet they are. They are afraid of me. Of what I could bring to them.”
Obi-Wan blinked away the tears, took a deep breath. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no death, there is the Force. He knew that somehow, repeating the first two lines would scarcely offer him solace now. “Of what you could bring to them?”
“Yes.” A hint of a twisted smile appeared on Palpatine’s lips. “For you see...Darth Plagueis was real. He was my master. He taught me everything I knew. Before I killed him, that is.”
“But you can’t possibly be – ’’
“I am, Master Kenobi.” A hint of somberness appeared now on Palpatine’s – no, the Sith Lord’s, Obi-Wan reminded himself – lips. “I am sorry. I truly am. But there was no other way.”
“Then who are you?” Obi-Wan knew that somehow, he already knew the answer, but he had to know.
Palpatine’s smile seemed to grow wider. “Who do you believe I am, Master Kenobi? I am the Sith Lord you’ve been looking for. I am Darth Sidious.”
Good twist ...
Date: 2012-12-28 03:49 pm (UTC)