For allbingo
Dec. 2nd, 2021 12:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ladyofleithianTitle: A Dose of Reality
Summary: Poe tells Finn how he recognized Kylo on Crait.
Prompt: Secret Identity
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
The Falcon is already in hyperspace, and the Resistance is already dispersing to their different sites, going off on their own to deal with what’s going on any which way they can. The adrenaline rush of just being able to escape the First Order has worn off, and Poe is no exception. It’s like the beginnings of a hangover after a bad night of partying. Except partying doesn’t usually involve something like this happening.
Usually. Depending on the Life Day parties and fetes out there.
Ben is Kylo Ren. Ben is Kylo Ren. It’s something that Poe can barely comprehend. He’d tried to rationalize it with other horrible possibilities in terms of Leia saying “I know my son is gone”, but in the end, it had all slammed up against this horrible truth: Ben and Kylo are the same.
This can’t be real. Poe doesn’t know how it’s possible for it to be real. It is real anyway.
***
Finn talks to him. “Did you know?” he says. Gently, because it’s Finn. Because Finn would never push, unnecessarily, in order to make Poe hurt.
"I didn’t. Before.” Poe sighs as he speaks. “I heard Rey beat him on Starkiller, but I didn’t hear what he looked like. There weren’t any hints as to who he really was.”
Finn nods. “Did you know him?”
Finn will judge him. But there’s no use hiding it. If it’s the end of their friendship, so be it; Poe is surprised he didn’t at least push it during his wild bantha chase that he sent Finn and Rose to on Cantobight.
***
“Kylo Ren wasn’t always my enemy,” Poe said. “I know that, once upon a time, he was my friend. He wasn’t always Kylo Ren. We grew up together when we were kids. Before it all went wrong.”
Finn nods. His face is carefully neutral; Finn is good at that. "So even he was a kid once. I figured that. Rey and I…we saw him break down to his father on Starkiller Base. No idea if that was a trap or not…”
Poe stiffens. Whether or not Ben was faking…Poe knows that he doesn’t like the idea of Ben being upset. He still remembers, after all. After Kijimi — and he’ll tell Finn another time. He probably still is struggling to get his mind around probably the least likely pair of childhood friends ever — Ben carried him. Ben supported him, worshipped him, believed in him — it was, at the time, something that kept Poe from having a sobbing breakdown, at least. Especially after failing to save two people: one from dying, one from herself.
“I don’t know either,” he says. “I mean…I wasn’t there.”
“I know.” Finn continues: “What made him fall? Do you know?”
“I don’t. I know…before he disappeared and probably came back as Kylo, he contacted me. He…he was a mess. Crying, talking about how he’d killed the people at the Academy. I didn’t think he did. Now I just wonder if I was lying to myself. One of the biggest regrets of my life.”
“Don’t say that,” Finn says gently. "Don’t ever say that. You…you cared about him. Whoever he was before, you cared about him. Maybe he felt the same way about you, maybe he didn’t. But it doesn’t make you a bad person. Not even a little bit.”
There was something about what Finn said where even though it was ultimately a small thing, Poe felt…better, somehow. Something about Finn saying that it wasn’t his fault…it was a miracle that Finn still stood by him, even though Poe had ultimately let him down. Even thinking about what could have happened at Cantobight, about Finn and Rose both dying…
Poe swallowed. “I’m glad you’re here.” He’d have to tell Rose that too, when she woke up. Stars willing, Poe considered everyone on the Falcon a friend, and he wasn’t about to let them down by any means.
“So am I,” Finn said. “We all are.”
And Poe knew that that was comfort enough. He still had work to do — was it possible to save Ben? He’d cross that bridge when he got to it.
Summary: Poe tells Finn how he recognized Kylo on Crait.
Prompt: Secret Identity
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
The Falcon is already in hyperspace, and the Resistance is already dispersing to their different sites, going off on their own to deal with what’s going on any which way they can. The adrenaline rush of just being able to escape the First Order has worn off, and Poe is no exception. It’s like the beginnings of a hangover after a bad night of partying. Except partying doesn’t usually involve something like this happening.
Usually. Depending on the Life Day parties and fetes out there.
Ben is Kylo Ren. Ben is Kylo Ren. It’s something that Poe can barely comprehend. He’d tried to rationalize it with other horrible possibilities in terms of Leia saying “I know my son is gone”, but in the end, it had all slammed up against this horrible truth: Ben and Kylo are the same.
This can’t be real. Poe doesn’t know how it’s possible for it to be real. It is real anyway.
***
Finn talks to him. “Did you know?” he says. Gently, because it’s Finn. Because Finn would never push, unnecessarily, in order to make Poe hurt.
"I didn’t. Before.” Poe sighs as he speaks. “I heard Rey beat him on Starkiller, but I didn’t hear what he looked like. There weren’t any hints as to who he really was.”
Finn nods. “Did you know him?”
Finn will judge him. But there’s no use hiding it. If it’s the end of their friendship, so be it; Poe is surprised he didn’t at least push it during his wild bantha chase that he sent Finn and Rose to on Cantobight.
***
“Kylo Ren wasn’t always my enemy,” Poe said. “I know that, once upon a time, he was my friend. He wasn’t always Kylo Ren. We grew up together when we were kids. Before it all went wrong.”
Finn nods. His face is carefully neutral; Finn is good at that. "So even he was a kid once. I figured that. Rey and I…we saw him break down to his father on Starkiller Base. No idea if that was a trap or not…”
Poe stiffens. Whether or not Ben was faking…Poe knows that he doesn’t like the idea of Ben being upset. He still remembers, after all. After Kijimi — and he’ll tell Finn another time. He probably still is struggling to get his mind around probably the least likely pair of childhood friends ever — Ben carried him. Ben supported him, worshipped him, believed in him — it was, at the time, something that kept Poe from having a sobbing breakdown, at least. Especially after failing to save two people: one from dying, one from herself.
“I don’t know either,” he says. “I mean…I wasn’t there.”
“I know.” Finn continues: “What made him fall? Do you know?”
“I don’t. I know…before he disappeared and probably came back as Kylo, he contacted me. He…he was a mess. Crying, talking about how he’d killed the people at the Academy. I didn’t think he did. Now I just wonder if I was lying to myself. One of the biggest regrets of my life.”
“Don’t say that,” Finn says gently. "Don’t ever say that. You…you cared about him. Whoever he was before, you cared about him. Maybe he felt the same way about you, maybe he didn’t. But it doesn’t make you a bad person. Not even a little bit.”
There was something about what Finn said where even though it was ultimately a small thing, Poe felt…better, somehow. Something about Finn saying that it wasn’t his fault…it was a miracle that Finn still stood by him, even though Poe had ultimately let him down. Even thinking about what could have happened at Cantobight, about Finn and Rose both dying…
Poe swallowed. “I’m glad you’re here.” He’d have to tell Rose that too, when she woke up. Stars willing, Poe considered everyone on the Falcon a friend, and he wasn’t about to let them down by any means.
“So am I,” Finn said. “We all are.”
And Poe knew that that was comfort enough. He still had work to do — was it possible to save Ben? He’d cross that bridge when he got to it.
