For ladiesbingo
Sep. 4th, 2020 06:50 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ladyofleithianTitle: The Woman Not Leia
Summary: Holdo visits Leia in medbay.
Prompt: Hopelessly Devoted
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author’s Notes: I don’t necessarily ship Leia and Holdo, but I think it’s plausible considering TLJ.
It’s Holdo who gets the message about Leia being comatose, and when D’Acy asks her if she wants to take control of the Resistance while Leia’s unconscious, Holdo decides to do so.
She’s not a fool. She knows that other people will judge her thanks to her unusual appearance (gender isn’t really an issue in regards to Holdo leading the Resistance; if it was, Leia would have been doomed a long time ago), but she doesn’t care about judgment. Not really. After all, Holdo cares about doing the right thing. Always has, always will.
Medbay. She watches as the machines hooked up to Leia beep, as they click and whir and — stars, she remembers when she was sixteen, and so foolish, when she thought that there was something awesome about death, awe-inspiring. She’s older now, much older, Leia’s age, and she knows better now. There’s nothing awe-inspiring, fascinating about death.
She looks down at Leia, squats beside her. It shouldn’t be this way. Leia should be up by now. Standing. Giving orders, leading people into battle. Being Leia.
She shouldn’t be so quiet.
“Leia,” Holdo says, “I know you can hear me.” A beat. “I just know.”
The click and whir of the machines just keeping Leia alive. Just.
“I’m sorry,” Holdo says. She doesn’t cry (the woman wearing the queenly mask does not cry, after all), but she falters. “I should have gotten here sooner. For you.” For Paige, for Tallie...for everyone we lost.
"I’ll be strong,” Holdo says. “For you, for everyone. It’s my job.” A sigh. “Someone has to, times like this. I...”
She’s about to tell Leia she loves her. It’s almost impossible not to love this woman, for her strength, for her conviction — but she doesn’t want to betray everything, even in a sterile white medbay where Leia’s clinging to life. This woman, who Amilyn would do anything to protect and defend.
“I’ll remember what you taught me,” Holdo says. "Come back, Leia. We need you.”
I still do.
She gets up, brushes off her silky lavender dress (and she knows they’ll judge her for it, they’ll just feel in their bones that it’s not Leia) and heads back. She has a speech to give.
Summary: Holdo visits Leia in medbay.
Prompt: Hopelessly Devoted
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author’s Notes: I don’t necessarily ship Leia and Holdo, but I think it’s plausible considering TLJ.
It’s Holdo who gets the message about Leia being comatose, and when D’Acy asks her if she wants to take control of the Resistance while Leia’s unconscious, Holdo decides to do so.
She’s not a fool. She knows that other people will judge her thanks to her unusual appearance (gender isn’t really an issue in regards to Holdo leading the Resistance; if it was, Leia would have been doomed a long time ago), but she doesn’t care about judgment. Not really. After all, Holdo cares about doing the right thing. Always has, always will.
Medbay. She watches as the machines hooked up to Leia beep, as they click and whir and — stars, she remembers when she was sixteen, and so foolish, when she thought that there was something awesome about death, awe-inspiring. She’s older now, much older, Leia’s age, and she knows better now. There’s nothing awe-inspiring, fascinating about death.
She looks down at Leia, squats beside her. It shouldn’t be this way. Leia should be up by now. Standing. Giving orders, leading people into battle. Being Leia.
She shouldn’t be so quiet.
“Leia,” Holdo says, “I know you can hear me.” A beat. “I just know.”
The click and whir of the machines just keeping Leia alive. Just.
“I’m sorry,” Holdo says. She doesn’t cry (the woman wearing the queenly mask does not cry, after all), but she falters. “I should have gotten here sooner. For you.” For Paige, for Tallie...for everyone we lost.
"I’ll be strong,” Holdo says. “For you, for everyone. It’s my job.” A sigh. “Someone has to, times like this. I...”
She’s about to tell Leia she loves her. It’s almost impossible not to love this woman, for her strength, for her conviction — but she doesn’t want to betray everything, even in a sterile white medbay where Leia’s clinging to life. This woman, who Amilyn would do anything to protect and defend.
“I’ll remember what you taught me,” Holdo says. "Come back, Leia. We need you.”
I still do.
She gets up, brushes off her silky lavender dress (and she knows they’ll judge her for it, they’ll just feel in their bones that it’s not Leia) and heads back. She has a speech to give.
