For allbingo
Mar. 22nd, 2021 09:48 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ladyofleithianTitle: Periphery
Summary: Kylo can feel Poe on the periphery, but he can’t touch.
Prompt: Hiding Feelings
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author’s Notes: Call this inspired by a piece of Darkpilot meta I found on Tumblr (about Kylo possibly being jealous of Finn) I can’t find now.
He supposes he shouldn’t care, and when he goes off after ordering Hux to get BB-8 while leaving him unharmed, he manages to keep it hidden. In fact, when he thinks of FN-2187 and what he can sense from Poe (vibrant spirals of happiness that almost remind him of how they were six years ago, back when — no, he can’t think of Ben Solo, not now), he’s impressed that he hasn’t thrown some sort of childish fit.
A tantrum, Snoke would have mockingly called it, and it sends bristles of anger through Kylo thinking about it, but he supposes that he’s right. He swears that he can feel Poe and the traitor on the periphery, looping in his head, reminding him of happier times before things went so wrong.
Before Snoke ripped open his mind and body and forced him to torture Poe.
A rumble of anger starts deep in Kylo’s chest. It’s Snoke’s fault. No, he shouldn’t think that way about Snoke at all, he shouldn’t think that, the Supreme Leader is strong and wise, and if he used Kylo’s body as a tool, what does it matter —
He supposes it’s an accomplishment that he hasn’t thrown a “tantrum” in that moment.
Even as he looks out at the stars, he can feel Poe. Feel him, recovering from the crash. Waking up. He’s weak. Very weak. It’s not like Poe to crash something, though then again, the fact that his hands were bound had something to do with it.
On the periphery. Maybe that’s Kylo’s punishment. Being able to feel Poe out there, but not see. Not touch. He can feel his presence in the Force, and how much happier he is without Kylo.
It’s Kylo’s punishment. The Force is a cruel thing. And maybe he deserves it. Maybe he’s beyond redemption. He feels it, deep in his heart, that unworthiness that keeps him from crossing back to the other side.
Where he would be able to see Poe. To apologize. To touch.
He doesn’t show that guilt, though. He doesn’t show that pain. He hides it; it’s a good thing that masks are good at hiding things.
Summary: Kylo can feel Poe on the periphery, but he can’t touch.
Prompt: Hiding Feelings
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author’s Notes: Call this inspired by a piece of Darkpilot meta I found on Tumblr (about Kylo possibly being jealous of Finn) I can’t find now.
He supposes he shouldn’t care, and when he goes off after ordering Hux to get BB-8 while leaving him unharmed, he manages to keep it hidden. In fact, when he thinks of FN-2187 and what he can sense from Poe (vibrant spirals of happiness that almost remind him of how they were six years ago, back when — no, he can’t think of Ben Solo, not now), he’s impressed that he hasn’t thrown some sort of childish fit.
A tantrum, Snoke would have mockingly called it, and it sends bristles of anger through Kylo thinking about it, but he supposes that he’s right. He swears that he can feel Poe and the traitor on the periphery, looping in his head, reminding him of happier times before things went so wrong.
Before Snoke ripped open his mind and body and forced him to torture Poe.
A rumble of anger starts deep in Kylo’s chest. It’s Snoke’s fault. No, he shouldn’t think that way about Snoke at all, he shouldn’t think that, the Supreme Leader is strong and wise, and if he used Kylo’s body as a tool, what does it matter —
He supposes it’s an accomplishment that he hasn’t thrown a “tantrum” in that moment.
Even as he looks out at the stars, he can feel Poe. Feel him, recovering from the crash. Waking up. He’s weak. Very weak. It’s not like Poe to crash something, though then again, the fact that his hands were bound had something to do with it.
On the periphery. Maybe that’s Kylo’s punishment. Being able to feel Poe out there, but not see. Not touch. He can feel his presence in the Force, and how much happier he is without Kylo.
It’s Kylo’s punishment. The Force is a cruel thing. And maybe he deserves it. Maybe he’s beyond redemption. He feels it, deep in his heart, that unworthiness that keeps him from crossing back to the other side.
Where he would be able to see Poe. To apologize. To touch.
He doesn’t show that guilt, though. He doesn’t show that pain. He hides it; it’s a good thing that masks are good at hiding things.
