For allbingo
Oct. 31st, 2020 10:28 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ladyofleithianTitle: In One’s Footsteps
Summary: Ben Solo is meant to be a Victorian-era clergyman, but he desires much more than that, including aspiring judge Poe Dameron.
Prompt: Historical AU
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
As far as Ben Solo knew, he and Poe Dameron had always been friends.
Their parents had been friends, and so he and Poe had become friends as well. They had been close — and it had been when Ben got older that they were forced to take on their own responsibilities.
“You have much yet that you have to do,” his mother said to Ben. “You need to take on the necessary responsibilities as a man of the clergy, much like your uncle before you.”
Ben doubted he could ever be happy as a man of the clergy, but here he was. He didn’t tell his parents or his uncle how he felt; he doubted he ever could. But he could tell Poe in the dark. He could tell him the things that he doubted he could ever say in the day.
"Sometimes I wonder if I can ever be the man my family expects me to be,” Ben said to him. They were in the dark, and Ben...Ben was grateful that the maids and the other members of the household were asleep, for he did not want anyone else to know. “Sometimes I wonder if I am being forced into something I was never meant to be...”
“I feel it too, Ben.” Poe said. “We’ll find our way. Both of us.”
***
Time passed. Ben assisted in his uncle’s church, though he doubted he was happy about it. That he ever could be happy about it. He assisted, however. While his uncle gave his sermons, Ben found himself falling ever more in love with Poe, who was studying to uphold the law. They could never be together.
Even the girl that Ben was supposed to marry, Rey...she couldn’t go through with the marriage.
“I just won’t be happy, Ben,” she said. “There’s this man, Finn...”
“You love him.” Ben said. “I, too, have someone I am not supposed to love. My dearest friend.”
“Poe. Hardly surprising,” Rey said. “I see the way you look at him.”
“Do you?”
“You are far from subtle,” Rey said. “Ben...I hope that we’re both happy. You most of all. Finn...I know Finn will make me happy. I hope Poe does the same for you.”
Ben nodded. “I’m certain he will.”
***
“I heard that you have yet to marry.”
Ben didn’t miss the way that Poe looked when they later spoke in the empty parlor, the look like his heart had broken. Ben could not help but wonder why; there was no chance that Poe actually felt anything for someone like him. Him, of all people. Poe may not have been a king, but in Ben’s eyes, he was all too well.
“I’m happy for you,” Poe said, “I’m sure she’ll make a fine wife."
“Actually, we...discussed some things. Me and Rey. You see, she’s developed a liking for Finn Windu. She does not like this marriage any more than I do...not to a man that she does not love.”
“So she is free?” Poe said.
“If I can, I will help her.” Then, “Poe Dameron...I love you.” It was far from easy to say, far from easy to turn into reality, but Ben decided that he had to try anyway. “You are so very bright, so very radiant — your intelligence, your compassion and nobility, everything about you. And in being my partner, in every way, shape and form...I would be honored, were that the case.”
“I never thought you would speak those words,” Poe said softly.
There was a moment, Ben thought, when he wondered if everything about this would turn the darkness to light. All because of Poe. It was Poe who turned the darkness in his heart to light. Everything about him — when he saw someone like Ben and loved him all the same.
Their lips met. And for a moment, Ben thought, it was like they simply were made to be together.
The future was ahead of them, uncertain terrain, stormy — but Ben knew that as long as the two of them were together, they would make it.
Summary: Ben Solo is meant to be a Victorian-era clergyman, but he desires much more than that, including aspiring judge Poe Dameron.
Prompt: Historical AU
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
As far as Ben Solo knew, he and Poe Dameron had always been friends.
Their parents had been friends, and so he and Poe had become friends as well. They had been close — and it had been when Ben got older that they were forced to take on their own responsibilities.
“You have much yet that you have to do,” his mother said to Ben. “You need to take on the necessary responsibilities as a man of the clergy, much like your uncle before you.”
Ben doubted he could ever be happy as a man of the clergy, but here he was. He didn’t tell his parents or his uncle how he felt; he doubted he ever could. But he could tell Poe in the dark. He could tell him the things that he doubted he could ever say in the day.
"Sometimes I wonder if I can ever be the man my family expects me to be,” Ben said to him. They were in the dark, and Ben...Ben was grateful that the maids and the other members of the household were asleep, for he did not want anyone else to know. “Sometimes I wonder if I am being forced into something I was never meant to be...”
“I feel it too, Ben.” Poe said. “We’ll find our way. Both of us.”
***
Time passed. Ben assisted in his uncle’s church, though he doubted he was happy about it. That he ever could be happy about it. He assisted, however. While his uncle gave his sermons, Ben found himself falling ever more in love with Poe, who was studying to uphold the law. They could never be together.
Even the girl that Ben was supposed to marry, Rey...she couldn’t go through with the marriage.
“I just won’t be happy, Ben,” she said. “There’s this man, Finn...”
“You love him.” Ben said. “I, too, have someone I am not supposed to love. My dearest friend.”
“Poe. Hardly surprising,” Rey said. “I see the way you look at him.”
“Do you?”
“You are far from subtle,” Rey said. “Ben...I hope that we’re both happy. You most of all. Finn...I know Finn will make me happy. I hope Poe does the same for you.”
Ben nodded. “I’m certain he will.”
***
“I heard that you have yet to marry.”
Ben didn’t miss the way that Poe looked when they later spoke in the empty parlor, the look like his heart had broken. Ben could not help but wonder why; there was no chance that Poe actually felt anything for someone like him. Him, of all people. Poe may not have been a king, but in Ben’s eyes, he was all too well.
“I’m happy for you,” Poe said, “I’m sure she’ll make a fine wife."
“Actually, we...discussed some things. Me and Rey. You see, she’s developed a liking for Finn Windu. She does not like this marriage any more than I do...not to a man that she does not love.”
“So she is free?” Poe said.
“If I can, I will help her.” Then, “Poe Dameron...I love you.” It was far from easy to say, far from easy to turn into reality, but Ben decided that he had to try anyway. “You are so very bright, so very radiant — your intelligence, your compassion and nobility, everything about you. And in being my partner, in every way, shape and form...I would be honored, were that the case.”
“I never thought you would speak those words,” Poe said softly.
There was a moment, Ben thought, when he wondered if everything about this would turn the darkness to light. All because of Poe. It was Poe who turned the darkness in his heart to light. Everything about him — when he saw someone like Ben and loved him all the same.
Their lips met. And for a moment, Ben thought, it was like they simply were made to be together.
The future was ahead of them, uncertain terrain, stormy — but Ben knew that as long as the two of them were together, they would make it.
