ladyofleithian (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ladyofleithian) wrote2021-01-29 08:46 am
ladyofleithian) wrote2021-01-29 08:46 am
Entry tags:
For allbingo
Title: The Pull
Summary: What made Leia still think there was light in Kylo?
Prompt: Hope
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author’s Notes: Thought I would experiment a bit with the format a bit.
“There is still light in him, I know it."
Leia says it, even though there is a part of her that knows she’ll be seen as delusional at best, clinging to the scraps of hope that surround her. Everything has turned to violence, a family in ruins.
Her son, however, is not dead.
***
The Hosnian system is fallen. Leia can feel it, more than one disturbance in the Force, planets being snuffed out. Annihilated.
Her friends are dead. It is Alderaan come back to haunt her, a cataclysm that will echo long after the war is over. A wound in the Force. Leia read about those things, and she can imagine that somewhere, the Force is screaming at having been ripped apart so callously.
Ben didn’t just watch.
Even as she feels the Hosnian system shatter in the blink of an eye, hyperspace and the laws of physics being torn apart...Ben, ironically, is the one frantically searching for her. Making sure, through the Force, that she and Han weren’t on Hosnian Prime when it was destroyed.
Grandfather, if you can hear me, watch over them both. Protect them.
She wonders if Ben is praying to Anakin or Vader, like this person is more than the relative that Ben never knew, that they’re a powerful force that can be called on at will.
It’s selfish of Leia to feel relief at it as it happens. Leia knows that it doesn’t matter, this even-evil-has-loved-ones thing. This she knows.
But she knows, at least, that there is something there, something where he has some degree of caring for at least someone. Both his parents, at least. And Poe. (He hadn’t wanted to torture Poe. Leia doesn’t like what he did and that’s an understatement, but even so...)
***
"Are you all right, Poe?”
Leia is the one to talk to Poe when Poe actually gets back. When he stumbles off his ship and towards her, looking tired, almost about to collapse.
“Fine,” Poe says. “I wouldn’t have gotten out without Finn.”
“Finn?”
“One of the stormtroopers,” Poe says. “He’s a good man, believe me. He let me out when he could have just left me to...to...”
To Ben. It’s something that Leia wonders if she can, conceivably, tell him about it.
Poe’s been through enough. But is it right to let him suffer, at least, without knowing the truth?
“I believe you,” Leia says. “This Finn sounds brave.” It can’t have been easy for him, renouncing the First Order, but he did it anyway. He chose to do the right thing.
If Finn broke free of his conditioning, could Ben...? It’s not a fair comparison, but Leia’s been praying for a miracle for a while now.
"He’s amazing,” Poe says, and Leia doesn’t miss the way he lights up, just a moment.
“Indeed. Poe...I’m sorry for what happened to you.” She wishes, still, that she could have been in Poe’s place. She can take the pain, she has resources to. Poe didn’t.
“It’s...well, it’s not okay, but I don’t know what I expected,” Poe says, his voice brittle. "He’s done this before. Funny thing is that at points, it was like he didn’t want to do it...later on...but he did it anyway. And even if he didn’t want to do it, why didn’t he extend that courtesy to everyone else?”
Leia swallows. “I don’t know.”
“Am I weak, General?”
“Poe, you weren’t. I felt it. You fought tooth and nail.” Leia squeezes Poe’s shoulder. “You saved BB-8. Even if Ren got the general idea, you still bought BB-8 enough time to get away.”
“I guess you’re making sense.”
“Poe, you’re an incredibly brave man. One moment of vulnerability doesn’t change that.”
Poe takes a deep breath. “I saw everything. I saw Ben leave, again and again and again...”
“I’m sorry, Poe.”
She’s more sorry than Poe will ever know.
***
She can feel it. She doesn’t want to, but she feels it anyway — Ben’s anguish as he struggles against what Snoke’s doing, as he tries to resist —
— and as Poe struggles tooth and nail against what Ben’s doing.
Watch, General, Snoke sneers. See what you have wrought. See the fruits of your favoritism, the hatred of your own son. You deserve to feel this. Every part.
Leia grips the console so hard that she swears that her knuckles are turning white. “Take me instead,” she says, softly. “Snoke — if you have a grudge against me, take me, but leave my boys in peace.”
It’s pathetic. Leia knows it. If Snoke were tangible, she would have strangled him with a chain like she did with Jabba. But she can’t reach him. Can’t reach her boys.
She’d take their place, over and over again, if it meant nothing bad happened to them.
***
Han agrees to it, before Starkiller Base is attacked. “I almost thought I was in denial,” he said. “That I was kidding myself.”
“Then we both are,” Leia says. “I don’t like what he’s doing, but he’s still our son. I still love him. And I know you do too.”
Han swallows. “More than anything. I’ll do it. For you, for him.”
Leia hugs him, impulsively. Buries her face in his jacket — the same jacket that he’s worn all these years.
It’ll start with a little speck of light.
That will be enough.
Summary: What made Leia still think there was light in Kylo?
Prompt: Hope
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author’s Notes: Thought I would experiment a bit with the format a bit.
“There is still light in him, I know it."
Leia says it, even though there is a part of her that knows she’ll be seen as delusional at best, clinging to the scraps of hope that surround her. Everything has turned to violence, a family in ruins.
Her son, however, is not dead.
***
The Hosnian system is fallen. Leia can feel it, more than one disturbance in the Force, planets being snuffed out. Annihilated.
Her friends are dead. It is Alderaan come back to haunt her, a cataclysm that will echo long after the war is over. A wound in the Force. Leia read about those things, and she can imagine that somewhere, the Force is screaming at having been ripped apart so callously.
Ben didn’t just watch.
Even as she feels the Hosnian system shatter in the blink of an eye, hyperspace and the laws of physics being torn apart...Ben, ironically, is the one frantically searching for her. Making sure, through the Force, that she and Han weren’t on Hosnian Prime when it was destroyed.
Grandfather, if you can hear me, watch over them both. Protect them.
She wonders if Ben is praying to Anakin or Vader, like this person is more than the relative that Ben never knew, that they’re a powerful force that can be called on at will.
It’s selfish of Leia to feel relief at it as it happens. Leia knows that it doesn’t matter, this even-evil-has-loved-ones thing. This she knows.
But she knows, at least, that there is something there, something where he has some degree of caring for at least someone. Both his parents, at least. And Poe. (He hadn’t wanted to torture Poe. Leia doesn’t like what he did and that’s an understatement, but even so...)
***
"Are you all right, Poe?”
Leia is the one to talk to Poe when Poe actually gets back. When he stumbles off his ship and towards her, looking tired, almost about to collapse.
“Fine,” Poe says. “I wouldn’t have gotten out without Finn.”
“Finn?”
“One of the stormtroopers,” Poe says. “He’s a good man, believe me. He let me out when he could have just left me to...to...”
To Ben. It’s something that Leia wonders if she can, conceivably, tell him about it.
Poe’s been through enough. But is it right to let him suffer, at least, without knowing the truth?
“I believe you,” Leia says. “This Finn sounds brave.” It can’t have been easy for him, renouncing the First Order, but he did it anyway. He chose to do the right thing.
If Finn broke free of his conditioning, could Ben...? It’s not a fair comparison, but Leia’s been praying for a miracle for a while now.
"He’s amazing,” Poe says, and Leia doesn’t miss the way he lights up, just a moment.
“Indeed. Poe...I’m sorry for what happened to you.” She wishes, still, that she could have been in Poe’s place. She can take the pain, she has resources to. Poe didn’t.
“It’s...well, it’s not okay, but I don’t know what I expected,” Poe says, his voice brittle. "He’s done this before. Funny thing is that at points, it was like he didn’t want to do it...later on...but he did it anyway. And even if he didn’t want to do it, why didn’t he extend that courtesy to everyone else?”
Leia swallows. “I don’t know.”
“Am I weak, General?”
“Poe, you weren’t. I felt it. You fought tooth and nail.” Leia squeezes Poe’s shoulder. “You saved BB-8. Even if Ren got the general idea, you still bought BB-8 enough time to get away.”
“I guess you’re making sense.”
“Poe, you’re an incredibly brave man. One moment of vulnerability doesn’t change that.”
Poe takes a deep breath. “I saw everything. I saw Ben leave, again and again and again...”
“I’m sorry, Poe.”
She’s more sorry than Poe will ever know.
***
She can feel it. She doesn’t want to, but she feels it anyway — Ben’s anguish as he struggles against what Snoke’s doing, as he tries to resist —
— and as Poe struggles tooth and nail against what Ben’s doing.
Watch, General, Snoke sneers. See what you have wrought. See the fruits of your favoritism, the hatred of your own son. You deserve to feel this. Every part.
Leia grips the console so hard that she swears that her knuckles are turning white. “Take me instead,” she says, softly. “Snoke — if you have a grudge against me, take me, but leave my boys in peace.”
It’s pathetic. Leia knows it. If Snoke were tangible, she would have strangled him with a chain like she did with Jabba. But she can’t reach him. Can’t reach her boys.
She’d take their place, over and over again, if it meant nothing bad happened to them.
***
Han agrees to it, before Starkiller Base is attacked. “I almost thought I was in denial,” he said. “That I was kidding myself.”
“Then we both are,” Leia says. “I don’t like what he’s doing, but he’s still our son. I still love him. And I know you do too.”
Han swallows. “More than anything. I’ll do it. For you, for him.”
Leia hugs him, impulsively. Buries her face in his jacket — the same jacket that he’s worn all these years.
It’ll start with a little speck of light.
That will be enough.